{our response to daily suffering}

"I just. want. to. cook. — not hunt!" {A Holy Experience, blog by the author of One Thousand Gifts}

This post from today hit the mark for me because I have so often found myself in exactly such situations, including when I can't find my cooking tools:  trying to get work done and welling up inside with frustration and impatience when things don't go smoothly, time is wasted, messes are made, things fell completely out of order, wanting to blame, knowing I shouldn't vent outloud...

“And he who does not take up his cross and follow after me is not worthy of me…” ~Mt. 10:38

"Take up a cross… Be willing to suffer… this — these are the marks of a follower of Christ.
Perhaps our greatest daily temptation is to be impatient — to refuse to suffer.
Perhaps my greatest daily sin is to refuse to suffer — to refuse to take up the cross of Christ.
Perhaps my greatest sin is refusing to wait on God’s ways — but to want my own will done — now.
Patience is a surrendering to suffering — a willingness to wait — a carrying of the Cross.
Today — there is always that possibility — to carry the cross, surrender to suffering, be willing to wait…"

This message spoke to me {and I like the author's poetic description of a heart being spoke to:  "I’m hushed and gently turned around, the soul creases smoothed out, the heart dust brushed off."--this is what her recalled memory of the Scripture passage had done for her heart, and what her post has helped do for mine} about how each day we need to be prepared for the possibility of suffering, and our response to it is to take up 'the cross' {our sufferings to bear} and follow Him. We do not follow our own desires to rant or vent or blame...but we respond with a heart that belongs to Christ and seeks to have patience and grace in the midst of trouble. {Insert here: the new wooden plaque put up in the kitchen/dining area of our home--love these words}

Now, it is important to look at 'suffering' not in the context of our normal definition of suffering, but to interpret the word to also include our minor, everyday troubles. {"This cross of domestic patience here is really but driftwood for the spiritual midgets..." The author agrees that our suffering is minor compared to the suffering Christ did in carrying His cross, but the principle from Scripture remains.} What everday 'suffering' might look like, and just a couple examples:

• problems {being late somewhere, when things break}
• discomfort {physical ailments, being too hot or cold, being hungry or tired, kids' car noise hurting damaging ears}
• messes {tracked dirt, splattered mud, dirty faces, hands and feet, toothpaste in the sink, spots on the faucets and mirrors}
• disorder {lost items, clutter}
• irritation {when you find your children have not obeyed, when your husband...well, I won't go there}
• time wasted {when you have to wait. in line. in traffic. for others.all the time.}
• inconvenience {all of the above}

Two nights ago, I happened to see the Tom Cruise movie, "The Last Samurai" played on tv, and was intrigued again, as I always am when I hear of soldiers and war, how warriors can go into battle with confidence amidst fear because of their focus and dedication to their purpose. It is a life of discipline, as the Samurai people displayed in that movie.

Each day, whether we choose to accept the fact or not, we are facing a battle with something that wants to pull us away from our purpose; to distract us from our focus. And we need to be mindful of the small, everyday ways we are falling apart slowly, lest we don't even realize what is happening to us. Today, I am challenged to better discipline myself; to steel myself to be ready for the everyday possibility for suffering and to be prepared to hold steady with the proper response during moments where I face discomfort and impatience because of problems.

I think many people pride themselves in living a well-disciplined life in other, seemingly larger, outward areas of life, such as doing solid work at their job, always being on time, keeping a clean home and manicured yard, maintaining a fit and healthy body, maintaining relationships, going to church regularly, etc. These are all great things to do, but do we approach the vital inward aspects of life--having the proper response to problems, 'grace under fire', a calm and quiet spirit despite turbulance, honoring God and others with our attitude--with the same resolve and discipline?

In my kitchen, above the cupboards, is a wooden sign of the word "PRAY". When I glace at that word throughout the day, I am reminded to finish the sentence in my head in that moment with a prayer from the heart, "Lord, I PRAY..." Here is a list of what I am praying for in the everyday moments this week:

• for the proper response to suffering
• for grace
• for patience; a willingness to wait
• for steely discipline
• for an acceptance of {to surrender to} my suffering to bear "for in this life you will have trouble..."
• for joy
• for a thankful heart that focuses on the gifts in life rather than the pain

Expectations and Truth

The following was written by a new blog friend, Kelly, Paradise Found, and is shared with permission. Her words are a beautiful reminder of the breadth of God's love for us and to keep our focus on His truth amidst the ups and downs of everyday life. The Scripture she uses, I first came across this morning on another friend's blog description, Lindsay,The Button Fam, and so I have had the worship song "Mighty to Save" in my head all day. I added a music playlist to my blog in the sidebar, so you can check out the song and worship with me.

These are the things I can expect on any given day:
1. I will feel tired when I wake up
2. My husband and little man Matthew will make me coffee.
3. My kids will fight.
4. Not everyone will meet my expectations.
5. I will not accomplish all I feel I need to during the day.
6. I will feel love and frustration for my dear children.
7. I will feel angry at myself for the way I let my flesh respond to my kids sometimes.
8. I will worry about finances.
9. I will have laundry to fold.
10. There will be mess and mess and mess to clean up.

This is the truth I can hang my hat on:
"The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." Zephaniah 3:17

God is with me! He is strong and mighty! He takes delight in me! He quiets the chaos in my head with his love! He rejoices over me and sings over me! What will be my focus today? The expectations or the truth?

Happy Fall!

I just got this cool email from a friend (thanks Secelia), and thought it was great to pass along!



Being a Christian is like being a pumpkin. God lifts you up, takes you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. He opens you up, touches you deep inside and scoops out all the yucky stuff-- including the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc. Then He carves you a new smiling face and puts His light inside you to shine for all the world to see. This was passed on to me from another pumpkin. Now, it is your turn to pass it to a pumpkin. I liked this enough to send it to all the pumpkins in my patch. Happy Fall!

Something’s Fishy

We took some of our salmon/trout in to Tony’s Fish Market (est. in 1936) in Oregon City to get smoked today, and the kids plugged their noses upon entering as they caught a wiff of the strong fish smell. The man there leans over the counter plugging his nose, as well, and teases, “Ewwwww, it smells like kids in here!” They smiled, but kept holding their noses. Then he looks at Andrew and says, “So, I guess you don’t want to work here for me?” “No!” says Andrew. “Oh, cause I pay $20/hour!” I say, “Andrew, are you sure? That would buy you a lot of candy!” He whispers to me, “I think I’d get sick!” I laugh and say, “You’ll stick to catching the fish, huh?” “Yeah,” he says. Then the man tells a story of when his brother was six, found a $100 bill in his dad’s drawer, thought it was $1, took it to the store to buy candy, and came home with huge bags full of $100-worth in candy! Can you imagine? And that must have been thirty-forty years ago when candy cost much less!
Anyway, this charming exchange made up for the terrible smell at the fish house, and the feeling of bile that was rising in my throat, as well. Blah! It is nice (and often times rare) to find such kind/personable people out there. I really appreciate it when I do. It also makes me take note of my own attitude towards people I meet when I’m out and about. It can really make someone’s day to just take a little extra care in making kind conversation. This is also what Pastor Dale speaks of so often when he shares of his exchanges with people. We are called to love others, and we can show this in simple dealings with people of all walks in our day-to-day conversations. Yes, love covers a multitude of sins, and as I found today, love in the form of kindness also covers some of the stench of a fish cannery.

Wordless (or not!) Wednesday # 7: It all Began on Salt Creek Road

I just thought I'd post my favorite picture from our wedding. I meant to put this photo on for our anniversary in June, but we were away on vacation.


This picture was taken in front of the small, country Baptist church in Dallas that we were both raised in, and the church is on the road Jac grew up on. His childhood home is a mile from the church, and my childhood home is a mile or two up the hill from there. All those years we were growing up, playing in the woods, working in the garden, eating meals with our families,...romanticizing in our heads about our future and what it would hold, and we were a mere mile or so from each other all that time.

Growing up, I can remember wondering who my husband would be and where he was right then. I remember wondering if I knew him, or if he was someone I hadn't met yet. Looking back at how our lives unfolded in God's timing to become something even greater than we could have imagined makes me excited for the future, to see what God has in store for us next. I trust God, who knows infinitely more than I can even fathom, and works all details out for His greater plan.

Jac asked me out for the first time just a few feet from where this wedding picture was taken. It was October 1995, when Jac and I returned to the church with a group of friends from the 'College & Career' Sunday School class, after an outing to the beach together. As my friend and I walked to my car, getting ready to leave, Jac caught up to us. I was caught off guard as he called to me and asked to talk to me for a minute. It was then that my whole world changed in an instant. I hadn't paid particular attention to Jac that day at the beach, but as soon as he said his next words, "I wanted to ask you if you'd like to go out sometime?", I was from then on, forever changed. I dumbly said, "Yeah, that would be fun," and he said ok, and that he'd call me. That was it. He called me two days later, and we had a date the next weekend. In the three months following this life-altering exchange, I lost 30 pounds. I felt nervous and weak a lot of the time. He consumed my every thought. It was so strange. I had never fell for someone like that before. I still don't get it. How does that happen, that you can feel so strongly about someone you didn't even pay attention to just moments earlier? Maybe, unconsciously, I was paying attention, but I just didn't realize it. He is six years older than I, and I guess I just never thought he'd pay attention to me in that way. I was wrong. He commuted down an hour from Portland, and we went out nearly every weekend for the next two and a half years!

As I look at this wedding picture, and down the road where our lives together began, it symbolizes the road to our future. I realize, as I look down the road into that future, I can't see all that is there, but I do see the hope we have in God's plan. That hope is like the rays of the summer sun setting down Salt Creek Road.

"Thankful Thursday" # 1

It is time to begin another day of themes--it is always good to be thankful. Being thankful changes your outlook on life--and I don't mean just thinking your thankful--being thankful is different. It is taking time to really acknowledge what you have in life that is good, and then letting this knowledge of God's blessings change your heart, attitudes, and actions. It is about choosing to let go of what is wrong--to not acknowledge what isn't so good in life for a time, so that only peace and praise exist in your heart.

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things." Philippians 4:8

I am thankful for (a lot) but...for today, hmmm...I am thankful, in particular, that I have no cavities following today's dentist appointment, that it was my favorite weather today (sunny and upper 70's), that I am feeling so excited about homeschool planning lately, as well as homemaking this week, for fun in the sun with my children, that Jac got to go on a Willamette speedboat ride today as part of his day at work (he got to enjoy the sun and have fun, too), and, finally, that Jac and I have been so kind and respectful to each other this week. I love the way that feels--when we just really connect and click--I see his eyes sparkle, we smile at each other, my heart fills up...yes, I'm most thankful for that this week.

Planet Earth

Jac, our resident 'Planet Earth' photographer, captured this breathtaking scene of Mt. Hood on his recent flight to Brazil. Unfortunately, it was dark (both ways) flying over the Amazon Rainforest.

"I lift my eyes up to the mountains--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1,2

Happy Earth Day, 2007!

Did you know that if the earth's land were divided up equally among all of its inhabitants, we would each own 4 acres? What are you doing to preserve your part of the planet; to leave behind a place that is healthy and of some value to the next generation?

Never really thought I'd be saying that...as a conservative Christian, I guess I just usually, and probably without really thinking, distance myself from secular, humanistic agendas, and I am turned off by those who seem to 'worship' nature instead of Creator. Besides, our treasure is supposed to be in heaven, right? However, going along with our last series of teaching at church, I have been putting more thought into secular and global issues because it is exactly that closed-mindedness, of Christians like myself, which turns off so many who need to know our Savior.

Have you seen the "ground-breaking 11-part series, Planet Earth, that was 5 years in the making, 2,000 days of filming, 204 locations..."? We have been watching it on Discovery for the past few weeks. It really is amazing and has affected me...I have been seeing the world around me differently because of these amazing photographers. They captured such dramatic, mostly never-before-seen (or filmed) nature events. I couldn't believe how many things from nature I had never seen or even heard of before!...Jim heard that this project had no limitations of the budget, but only the assignment to succeed in making the best documentary on the Planet!

On another documentary I saw this weedend, "Green, the new Red, White, and Blue", there were other interesting facts--mostly ones that made you really stop and evaluate how you can save energy and reduce waste. Now, this has always been something I felt was important. I have always done the an environmental unit in the classrooms I've taught, which included a fun recycling project. The object of this project was simply to make something useful out of what we would normally throw away. The kids loved this project and it got them thinking creatively about new uses for things.

The idea to take away here is that this world exceeds anything man could ever fully understand, and every awesome aspect of nature speaks to the amazing God who made it all. The Bible even speaks of how all of nature praises Him (Psalm 148). And, yes, this God put man here to "fill the earth and subdue" it (Genesis 1:28), but He also wants us to take care of it out of respect for Him who made it.

"You made him ruler over the works of Your hands; You put everything under his feet." Psalm 8:6

Jesus Back Where He Belongs

This story was emailed to me today:

UNITED STATES MAP--"A father wanted to read a magazine but was being bothered by his little girl, Shelby. She wanted to know what the United States looked like. Finally, he tore a sheet out of his new magazine on which was printed the map of the country. Tearing it into small pieces, he gave it to Shelby and said, "Go into the other room, and see if you can put this together. This will show you our whole country today." After a few minutes, Shelby returned and handed him the map, correctly fitted and taped together. The father was surprised, and asked how she had finished so quickly. "Oh," she said, "on the other side of the paper is a picture of Jesus. When I got all of Jesus back where He belongs, then our country just came together."

God is Good

The following is a good reminder for us to remember God is in control in times of trouble, even though we do not understand it all. This is written by Bill Perkins, of Million Mighty Men ministry.

"Today I'm asking, "Why would someone kill 32 people, most of them kids, at Virginia Tech? (I can't write the words without seeing the bloody image of a victim being carried out on of a building). Behind that question lingers a harder question: Why would God allow such a terrible thing to happen?

If a friend who's hurting asks you that question the best answer is no answer. Just silence and a hug, a tear, and a prayer.

Of course, hundreds of books have been written which attempt to answer the question: Why does God allow suffering? While no answer removes the pain of a loss, I've found that with understanding comes comfort and hope. I've discovered in the Bible a number of truths:

First, life is difficult and God is good. Just as an artist uses black paint to make shadows, without which a painting would have no contrast, so God uses hardship in our lives. In Romans 8:28 Paul declares that God uses "all" things for the good of those who love him.

Second, God allows us to suffer to enable us to comfort others. The person who has been wrapped in the blanket of God's comfort is best able to offer it to a hurting friend. A parent who has grieved the loss of a child is best able to offer comfort to another grieving parent. (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

Third, God allows us to suffer to show us our weakness so we can rely on his strength. Paul said he suffered so that, "we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead" (2 Corinthians 1:9).

Fourth, while my losses may confound and anger me, God knows what he's doing. Job freely challenged the goodness and wisdom of God after the loss of his family, wealth and health. After God had addressed his questions, Job said, "I spoke of things I did not understand. Things too wonderful for me to know" (Job 41:3).

Fifth, while God created man with the potential to do evil, God is not responsible for evil and suffering. We are. The choice to sin and walk away from God brought with it many consequences--including suffering and death.

I know that when I hurt the most, while the pain lingered, the assurance that God is up to something good gave me strength. I think the psalmist said it best: "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea . . .
'Be still, and know that I am God'" (Psalm 46:1-2, 10). "

Get Out On the Right Side

It is so important how we begin each day. I cannot overestimate this. Getting up early, while the house is still quiet, to give the first part of each day to God is the best thing I can do to live a beautiful life. When I spend time with Him in prayer and His Word, my days are: smoother, filled with greater joy, marked by a better ability to cope with difficulties, calm in the midst of the storm, peaceful. The more I do this, the more I rely on Him and not myself. Things get done, my attitude is right, and I am able to be a greater example to my family. I am continually working on consistency in this; disciplining myself to keep to a healthy routine and create rituals in my life that foster the best life I can lead.
I think we sometimes put too little thought into the day-to-day decisions we are making, when in reality God has a plan even in the little things. Little things add up, and can create habits we do not want. But, even a seemingly small thing, like what time I set the alarm clock for (and how many times I change it), affects my ability to make the best choices, if it leads to me putting off seeking His wisdom for the day. Take time to listen to what He wants to tell you, focus your mind on Him, then let Him lead you through the day.